Before you continue to read here, don’t forget to read Part 1 of the Exposed Series!
What does being exposed look like?
This is a genuine question that I have asked both my parents and myself. I really wasn’t sure what to expect from the 5-worded prayer, but trust that God delivered. For my mother, she described it as God cracking her open and revealing how utterly gross she was. Not that her soul was ugly, but how ugly sin was to God and after salvation, she viewed it the same. I know many of you can’t picture my mom’s disgusted face, but imagine the seeing the most disgusting bathroom in the world. Now look in the mirror. That’s how God views sin, and how we as Christians should also see it.
But this view of sin, doesn’t come overnight. It’s a process, a long journey of endurance that comes with wisdom, knowledge, and understanding. For me, when God exposed my sin, I could only cry. Gut-wrenching sobs. Because I had no idea that the things that I had done, as nice as I was, had made me so ugly.
Let me explain my story.
In a season of struggle with spiritual warfare, I found myself praying diligently to God. I would turn on the smooth, new age-y worship music to set the atmosphere, and sit and hear from Him. I did this for many days in my apartment until one day something shifted. I don’t know what I asked, and I am not sure what I confessed, but what I saw shook me to my core. Let me preface this. The calling on my life allows me to visualize many things and this a time where it happened. As I kneeled over praying to God, it was as if a mighty sword emblazoned in fire, beautifully adorned, cut me up my back, then was stuck in the ground in front of me, right in front of my face. Think King Arthur, with the sword Excalibur, stuck in the ground. My back looked as if my ribcage had been opened, revealing the absolute inner parts of my body. At first, nothing happened. But then I saw snakes crawl out of my back and slither away. Some out the door, some seemed to escape in crevices, but they crawled away from me. They were so dark, vile creatures. I don’t know about any of you, but I wouldn’t willingly be around one if I couldn’t help it.
Now, I know what some of you are thinking. “This lady is absolutely crazy and there’s no way she could see that.” However, imagery aside, the message is obvious.
The sword was a representation of the Word of God, and it was cutting me up with conviction. Hebrews 4:12 NLT says,
12 For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires.
And for me, I was being cut down to the bone. I was being exposed to myself in the worst way. My sin looked like what I feared the most, yet I harbored it inside of me.
In Romans 6:12 KJV, “Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, that ye should obey in the lusts thereof.“
By now you’re thinking, “but I confess my sins every day, especially the ones I know I did.”
But what about the secret sin?
What about those things we let fester inside of us? The hate, the malice, the bitterness of unforgiveness of others. Judgement, backbiting, gossiping, you know, “it’s my personality” those things we don’t view as sin. What about those?
I had to understand the intentionality of being repentant daily of both my known and unknown sin. Forgiveness came and I felt much better in my walk, but there was still something I missed.
I wasn’t just asking God to expose my sinful nature; I was asking Him to reveal my spiritual nature. How did He see me?
Psalms 139:23-24 (AMPC) it says,
23 Search me [thoroughly], O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts!
24 And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
If you will, stay with me in this journey of what it means to be exposed. Be on the look out for Part 3.
“Being then made free from sin, ye became the servants of righteousness.” Romans 6:18
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